cancer

[speedy]

Hello to you all; I was looking at Prectical Machinist reading a thread on manners which prompted me to thank all you wonderful people for your honesty, advice and sympathy. My family and I appreciate all the concern expressed.
Mum has had the diagnosis confirmed after undergoing another MRI scan followed by a biopsy; My son and I made a surprise trip and saw her this week on her birthday; she was very pleased to see us.It was just a perfect day. She is going to take the conventional treatment route.Both her and Dad have been active members of the local cancer supporters group for some years so I guess they know what we`re all in for, hopefully later rather than sooner. As much as we wanted to we could only stay for the day as my wifes` Mum had passed away suddenly the day before and we had to return home:
sometimes it just pours down.
Thank you once more, Ken

[moldmonkey]

Sorry, Speedy

I just realized I never passed on my sisters advice. She said she doesn't know of any centers in N.Zealand. She did say hollistic methods combined with convential treatments seem too work well. Nothing too specific. I hope your mother is feeling better and my sympathies to your wife and family.

Jon

[speedy]

This is far removed from metal and I hope this is permitted here but I am seeking advice on this matter; all help and advice is greatly appreciated.
Three weeks ago my dear mother had a fall, injuring her back. Well she had an MRI which revealed much more than we needed and she was rapidly sent for a bone scan last Wednesday. This has identified but not yet confirmed secondary infection Metastasis in the lower spine, which from what I can gather is transmitted cancer cell growth. She has apparentley had a lump there for some time according to Dad. The pace that the medicos are attending to this leads me to the conclusion that it is near definite.
Mum is awaiting a biopsy to confirm; needless to say she is stressed and we are all doing our best to minimise this. I have looked on the net but most info is jargon to me.
If she is to undergo chemo or radiation then her immune system will need to be in the best shape possible, what can anyone advise? Vitamin E and Echinacea have been suggested already but there must be more?
I also need some straight advice on the possible outcomes of this illness. We want to be able to provide her with all she needs; a trip to the south island, see her birthplace again etc. These are things that are already in their plan but if there is a small time-frame left we will bring all these plans forward. My email is available to whoever wishes to advise privately. Mothers don`t live forever do they? I know it will happen eventually but it isn`t any easier.

thanks in advance you all, Ken NZ

[sandman2234]

Not much help on the information side, but how about we say a few prayers for Mom.
David from jax

[wierdscience]

Green leafy things are supposed to have something in them that fights cancer,several other things too,you might have a look at WebMD.com they do have some good advice on viatamins and such.

And yes we here will be praying,thats does more than we know.

[SGW]

Is there a hospice organization in NZ? If so, well worth contacting them although (one hopes!) it's premature.

[jr45acp]

I've added your Mum to my prayer list.

John B

[speedy]

Hi wierd, just about to head off to the sack, it`s 1:20am here. I`ll check out that site later this morning. Yes there is a Hospice org in NZ,thanks SGW. Mum and Dad have been members/supporters at their local cancer support for a number of years,my brother died of `C` 4yrs ago. Hopefully they wont be needing them too much or for some time yet?
I`m pursueing this so I can better assist her with any remedy and support. I`m a big believer in the power of positive thinking and organic clean foods; I realise that this isn`t the salvation but it sure beats depression and loading the immune system with toxins. I`ll look in again later.

copulater. Ken NZ

To all those of you who are praying , Mums` name is Patricia--- cheers

[This message has been edited by speedy (edited 08-19-2004).]

[Paul Gauthier]

I know it is quite a ways from NZ but there is a place in Mexico called "Oasis of Hope". It is near Tiajuana. Thier success rate in treating cancer is much better than anywhere in the USA But they use treatments that are not approved in the USA. My brother-in-law was going to go there but he died too days before he was to leave, he had just turned 50, that was 4 or 5 weeks ago.
Your mom is in our thoughts.



------------------
Paul G.

[Bruce Griffing]

I wish the best for your mother and hope she recovers. But in the spirit of an honest assessment, metastatic cancer is always bad news. It means that cells have escaped from the primary cancer site and have grown in other parts of the body. That makes it more difficult to treat. Surgical excision is not an option in this case. Chemotherapy is the favored approach because it hits the whole body. But some parts of the body are difficult to reach even with chemo. The inside of bones and the central nervous system are examples of areas where chemotherapy has difficulty killing metastatic cancer cells. Nonetheless, it can be helpful. I hope so in your mothers case.

[speedy]

Thanks for the replies so far. Some of you have opted to email me as I asked, you should continue to do so if you wish; I was thinking it may be better to post here as there are, withootdoubt others in a similar position as my family and they too may need this advice now or in the future. I will be unable to view for 3 days so I`ll spot you all then.

cheers----Ken N.Z

[Radmachine]

Speedy, I got real sick about 18 months ago and after many tests was diagnosed with Non-Hodgkins Lymphoma. For many years before, I regularly took Vitamins C and E, and Selenium. I still got the cancer, but I'm still here! I fully believe that the Selenium helped me get through the illness and the chemotherapy with so few side effects. I feel pretty good, now, and can still work in the shop some even though I get tired easily. I've heard that Co-Q-10
helps build up the immune system, but haven't tried it yet.

[lynnl]

Speedy, my prayers are with your mother and family.
You're absolutely right about the power of a positive attitude. That was confirmed to me a few years ago when I suffered excruciating chronic pain. Positive thinking and positive, calming mental/emotional qualities like joy, happiness, love, tenderness and compassion affect physiological processes in ways that are largely a mystery, and they may remain so forever. But the fact that the mechanisms aren't understood, or can't be studied in the lab and quantified makes them no less valid. The important thing is to accept that it is important...perhaps the single most important factor in our wellbeing that we can influence.
A young (40 or so) very athletic coworker of mine, a poster boy for good health, was diagnosed with Hodgkin's disease 3 or 4 years ago. His sister worked in health care, and provided him with a diet regimen based on her professional knowledge and personal observations common to successfully treated patients. He (Mike) kept a positive attitude thruout the ordeal and chemotherapy. He has since been given a clean bill of health, has regained his hair, and now shows no signs of the illness whatsoever. I know much of his routine consisted of a healty diet comprising prodigious quantities of fruit (apples, oranges, bananas, etc.). Mike is a big guy (6' 6", 250 # or so, regular jogger/weight lifter/youth athletics coach, whose appetite had always commanded awe and respect... http://bbs.homeshopmachinist.net//biggrin.gif During that treatment period he would show up at work with at least 12 to 15 pieces of fruit daily.
I remember that he had a list his sister provided, that ranked many foods (mostly fruit/vegetables) in order of their cancer fighting qualities.
If @you're interested@ I'll try to get that info and provide it (...@ or anyone else for that matter).

Lynn

[moldmonkey]

Speedy

I'm not religious but my thoughts are with you. My sister is an oncology nurse. I'll email her and she what advice she has to offer.

My Grandma was cured of lymphnomia (sp) by the Mayo Clinic 30 years ago and is still going strong. They can do even more now.

Jon

[speedy]

Thank you all for your positive, helpfull advics and words of support. I will pass this all on to Mum. All your experiences of this dreadful illness will better enable Pat and others to come to a broader understanding. This will hopefully enable a more informed choice to be decided. I will keep you all informed.

Love and hope----Ken N.Z http://bbs.homeshopmachinist.net//biggrin.gif http://bbs.homeshopmachinist.net//biggrin.gif

[spope14]

My prayers are with you. I just lost my father in law a month back yesterday, but it was a sudden loss, so use your time well...WHICH I HOPE IS YEARS!!!!!!

If you are at all near New England, there is the NORRIS COTTON CANCER CENTER at Dartmouth Hitchcock Medical Center, Hanover, NH - a part of Dartmouth College. A very highly rated nationally known cancer center that is growing, and on the cutting edge of research in all types of treatments. They have saved many a friend.

(Opps, read back, see you are in NZ - but hit their web site and use their resources anyway - as well as the one listed below)

Also, in Boston, there is the nationally known cancer center at one of their hospitals, name unknown but believe it Boston General. I had two friends with a very rare Leukemia diagnosed about six years back, prognosis very poor. Both are very much alive and well. I can ask one tomorrow.

My prayers to you, but never give up. My friends will tell you this, and tell the people they now counsel the same thing.

[This message has been edited by spope14 (edited 08-22-2004).]

[ibewgypsie]

I believe in Holistic mediciene. I have watched several things impossible for humans to do, they did them..

Positive thoughts, Happy thoughts, no negatives.

I have felt the energy coming from a audience. And the power of a faith healer. Both give me waves of something akin to energy. I have felt the crawly feeling up my neck when something bad is happening..

Tau Chi, I want to learn it, Focus of positive energy. Sometimes in the Tae Kwon Do I used to attempt to practise negative, hateful energy.

Make your mother know you love her, comfortable, and happy as you can.

My friend died last July from smoking, Smoking kills, I don't understand why people do it.. I miss him.



------------------
David Cofer, Of:
Tunnel Hill, North Georgia

[speedy]

My Mum passed away peacefully today at 1.10am. Finally free from pain, in the company of loving family members and friends http://bbs.homeshopmachinist.net//smile.gif http://bbs.homeshopmachinist.net//frown.gif http://bbs.homeshopmachinist.net//smile.gif. She was a good one.
My heartfelt thanks to all who offered advice, prayers or words or thoughts of support.

As they say : "this aint no practice run"

Ken

[Mike Burdick]

Ken,

I'm very sorry to hear that too.

Take care...

Mike

[ibewgypsie]

My sorrow for you and your family my friend.

We lost another one here, someone I tattooed.
That time of year perhaps when people make the journey together. (3) funerals and one wedding, one birth within a minute of the last relative passing.

I just hope when it comes our time, we are as well missed. You are never really gone as long as your memory lives in someone's heart.

David

[webbch]

speedy,

I'm sorry to hear about your loss. Kind of makes you realize how trivial some of the other "problems" we face really are.

Chad

[Stanko]

Hi Ken,
Sorry to hear your news, at least she is free from her burdens. I hope you and your family recover from your loss quickly.

You obviously thought the world of your Mum, what more could she ask from her son.

My thoughts are with you

Mike

[zl1byz]

Hi Ken.

Sorry to hear the news. It's never a good time or the right time when a loved one passes away. While we obviously have to accept and deal with these events when they happen. Try to focus on the positive things in your mum's journy of life. That's the important part the journy.

Keep well.

John.

[Padrig]

Ken

I also lost my mom 7 years ago to cancer. She had been fighting it for 7-8 years. Although I felt sad for not having her with me anymore, I felt more joy for her being at peace and in a better world. I hope you feel the same or come to eventually.

My prayers are with you and your family.

Pad

[hammerhead74000]

Godspeed, Patricia...

speedy - I hope this doesn't sound cliche, as I seem to be finding words to be somewhat... inadiquate... to this. But I shall try anyway.

I know what you are going through; for I, too, have lost some of those close to my heart... but know that you are not alone... and that although the mom-shaped hole in your heart won't ever quite go away, it will stop bleeding, eventually...

A little bit of advice from someone who's been there and done that - if you feel the need, it's OK to go in the bathroom, lock the door, turn on the shower, and cry for a while. You won't be any less of a man for it (actually, it's a reflection of how much she meant you). And, no, you don't have to talk to anybody about it if you don't want to. Or not; diffrent people cope in diffrent ways - one size does not fit all.

[speedy]

In the begining, I held it together while my Mother had hope in her heart for recovery or remission.
I/we spent a lot of time talking, crying, laughing and saying all those things that needed to be told before Mum went. She resisted taking too much morphine and methadone so she could still feel and be. But in the end even the morphine could not mask her from pain from even the most gentle hands.
Courageous and uncomplaining, I hope that I can face my own mortality so well when my time comes. The truth is that I hope I go quickly..

Ken

[torker]

Ken, I lost my Mother to brain cancer a few years ago. I know what you're feeling. And now my favourite sister in law has the same thing. It is an ugly disease and I hope I or my wife don't go that way.
Peace brother....
Russ

[x39]

Speedy, my sympathy to you and your family. With the loss of both your mother and brother to cancer, I hope you'll remember to go for a check up yourself. Remember, early detection is crucial.

[SGW]

My mother just died a couple of months ago. I'd been through deaths of grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousings, but the death of a parent is different.

It was time -- she was almost 98 -- but the loss is still huge.

I found, at the time of her death, the that thing that mattered most was just having people NOTICE. They didn't have to DO much of anything, but just acknowledge to me that yeah, your mother died and we pause long enough to tell you that we notice.

So...now I'm telling you that I hear you at this time of grief in your life, and I notice.

[JPR]

I having just gone down this road for the last 7 months, I understand and hope for the best for you and your mother.

My $.02
1. Keep hopefully. Folks like Lance Armstrong have recovered from extensive cancer.
2. Make sure the doctors are on the same page as you are with treatment choices.
3. Don't be hesitant to question the decisions or treatments suggested by the doctor.
4. Take care of yourself as much as possible.
5. Get lots of pictures with your family.

Here is a good resource http://www.mayoclinic.com/findinformation/conditioncenters/centers.cfm?objectid=0004582E-389F-1B32-82D780C8D77A0000
John

[ricksplace]

Speed- I agree with SGW. I notice too. I lost my mother to cancer 15 years ago so I know what it feels like.

I lost my dad a few years ago and a very peculiar thing happened. I suddenly felt alone. Here I am over 50 years old with wonderful kids, a good career and lots of friends, and I felt alone. I got over it.

I still miss both of my parents. While what we feel is painful, it is that which makes us human.

[debequem]

I am sorry to hear the news. Remember, ignorance is the biggest issue for you and your mother and the main cause for fear.

I have a little knowledge on the subject, since it was one of my interests from a biological standpoint. However, I am not sure exactly what form of cancer, if that is indeed what she has, you might be dealing with.

First, cancer is essentially when a cell becomes immortal. Normally, cells divide on a regular schedule, going through four phases of the cell life cycle (M, G1, S, and G2 phases). Most of the time the cell is in the G1 phase, if memory serves. This is the normal mode where the cell is not preparing to divide. A small segment of time the cell goes through a cycle to divide. Each division essentially sets a down counter or timer in the cell called a telomere. Each division cleaves off another segment until no more are left and the cell self destructs. This is called apoptosis. Basically, a cell has a life span and the telomere is the counter.

A cell becomes cancerous when all of the safety mechanisms (and they are many) are defeated by mutation of the cell’s DNA and infrastructure. These safety mechanisms will induce apoptosis (regardless of the telomere) if anything goes wrong with the cell and protect the rest of the organism. So, for a cell to become cancerous it must defeat or jimmy all of the cell’s safety mechanisms.

One more thing happens to the cell before it becomes cancer. Remember the cell’s life cycle? Well, a cancer cell also short circuits the life cycle so that it continuously sits in the cell division or mitosis phases. This is why cancer tumors grow so fast. The cancer cell becomes immortal and like a skipping record, continuously divides again and again.

Obviously, a cell that is cancerous needs lots and lots of nutrition to maintain the growth rate and the body responds by creating new blood sources to feed the growth. That is why weight loss is one symptom of cancer. When new blood vessels invade a tumor the tumor may actually breach the vessel wall. If any of the cancer cells are sloughed off in the process they get carried away in the blood stream and may reattach to specific sites in the body or organs. This is called metastasis. Different types of cancers have affinities for different tissues. Some like bone, some like lung tissues, and others may even invade the brain, but those are rare.

Your mother may have a form of bone cancer and it may reside in other areas of the body. Your doctors will tell by a series of tests.

What next? First, don’t panic. You need to get educated on the subject. The results of the tests will be your beacon as to which direction you go to learn more. You need to learn as much as humanly possible about the condition and this means doing a lot of research. As you become more educated on the subject you and your mother’s doctors can begin to effectively communicate and map out an action plan. Doctors are amazing with their breadth of knowledge, but they don’t know everything about the subject. So, you must take the lead role in getting educated so you can make the decisions as to what to do treatment wise.

Personally, I do not like or recommend homeopathic medicine. This is not the time to role dice on products and treatments that have no clinical studies to back them. Forget the wondrous claims.

Since cancer needs nutrition, it competes with your body’s needs. Chemo will tax your whole body’s reserves and deplete your immune system. Your mother should prepare both psychologically and physically for the treatment. She must eat well! Stress will impact the immune system, so positive thoughts and strong will power is required. Consult your doctors on recommended diets to maximize her strength. It is too late to really get crazy about foods that prevent cancer. The devil is already here, so you need to go into the fire fighting mode now. You will find your own reserves taxed helping your mother fight this, but keep her spirits up and keep her eating, even when the chemo makes eating hard. This will be a hard fight, but most people get through it and are better for it.

You, your family, and your mother’s attitude are an essential part of this fight. Make sure everyone works together toward winning the fight. Use support groups and educate, educate, educate yourself!!!

Good luck to you and your family. My prayers are with you.

Marv

[Padrig]

In regards to a couple of the last responses. I don't know how to say this without offensing anyone so I'll just say this; reading the whole thread before posting would be a good idea. http://bbs.homeshopmachinist.net//frown.gif

Pad

[kenc]

Speedy,
Your last couple of posts bought tears to my eyes.
So sorry....
kenc

[spkrman15]

my best to you and your family.

Rob

[hoffman]

We'll keep you in our prayers. Cherish your folks while you have them.

[speedy]

What a wonderful bunch of careing folk who frequent this site.
Thank you all for your kind words of support and advice.
To those who have posted late advice, thank you also, I'm not offended or upset in any way, it may serve to help others. No doubt we have all been guilty of not reading threads fully ... I have.
I saw a newborn baby today; It is the cycle of life; and when your parents pass on you must carry the mantle.
My sincere sympathy to others who are experiencing the same pain.
Give your Love to those around you, we all need to give and receive this most necessary emotion.
At her funeral, I will celebrate Mums' life with laughter, tears and respect for all that she was to me and mine.

Aroha to you all.

Ken




[This message has been edited by speedy (edited 03-23-2005).]