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sasquatch
01-01-2011, 06:14 PM
In discussions with friends we got onto the subject of spending many hours in the shop workin on projects instead of being in the house doing other things,, one guy has been lectured from his better half that she,s now just a "Workshop Widow"!!!!!!!!
Ever had to explain or justify why all those hours are required for your,e projects?:rolleyes:

Liger Zero
01-01-2011, 06:15 PM
I took an interest in her hobbies, she took an intrest in mine. Now it's to the point where she can make stuff using the mill and the lathe.

No single sisters. I am not going to die soon. And cloning is right out so stop asking.

oldtiffie
01-01-2011, 06:25 PM
You may have a different problem if she wants you out of the house and from her in her ear and from under her feet and she tells you to get a hobby or get moving.

A lot of new retirees have that problem, the more so if they try to"take charge" and tell her what to do.

Its quite an eye-opener when after retirement and you tell people of it that they feel sorry for your wife.

It may not improve when you come into the house from your cave - sorry, "shop" to use your computer etc.

My wife has never said I am under her feet, but if I am she asks if I have anything extra I need for my shop or computer.

I have my jobs around and in the house and out of the shop and I do them.

Our attitude is that we treat each other as equals and if the other is happy, we're happy.

It works very well - I ain't complaining.

Dr Stan
01-01-2011, 06:44 PM
Fortunately my wife is an artist (portraits, landscapes, still lifes, batiks, and sculptures) so she has a much better understanding of my need to be creative in my shop. It certainly does not hurt that I've helped her on some projects including pouring bronze; mating and framing; and being her "step 'n fetch it" at art shows. :D

Carld
01-01-2011, 08:20 PM
I just don't understand wives that want their husband hanging around them all the time. I guess I am lucky that my wife has a life of her own and doesn't want me hanging around her all the time. We both have our hobbies/professions and still spend time together but neither needs the other around them all the time.

I am glad I don't have a high maintenance wife and she's probably glad she don't have a high maintenance husband.

Oldbrock
01-01-2011, 08:32 PM
Dr Stan, I understand mating when it comes to home duties, but framing? is that something wierd I didn't hear about yet? OH! I get it. Matting and framing, sorry, got the wrong syntax there for a minute:eek: Happy New Year, Peter

lane
01-01-2011, 09:04 PM
You may have a different problem if she wants you out of the house and from her in her ear and from under her feet and she tells you to get a hobby or get moving.

A lot of new retirees have that problem, the more so if they try to"take charge" and tell her what to do.

Its quite an eye-opener when after retirement and you tell people of it that they feel sorry for your wife.

It may not improve when you come into the house from your cave - sorry, "shop" to use your computer etc.

My wife has never said I am under her feet, but if I am she asks if I have anything extra I need for my shop or computer.
It works very well - I ain't complaining.Our attitude is that we treat each other as equals and if the other is happy, we're happy.

It works very well - I ain't complaining.[/QUOTE]


That sounds just like something I wrote . My wife and i are exactly the same. I do my share around the house She sews and i keep her sewing machine workinOur attitude is that we treat each other as equals and if the other is happy, we're happy.

sasquatch
01-01-2011, 09:13 PM
But,, Honey,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, you spend all that time in your,e shop, then when you do finish up and come to bed,, you stay up all hours reading "Homeshop Machinist" magazines, then jump back and forth to your,e pile of other books beside the bed, researching stuff in "Machinery,s Handbook" and mumbling as you scribble notes , jump back up in the night and go to "Mic" some silly thing, or to dig through your,e scrap pile for that piece that would be perfect for that project, and on and on,,,,,,:D

spope14
01-01-2011, 10:00 PM
I only get that look on days that end with a "Y". Seriously though, most things I am making in the home shop also concern her, are repairing something that is needed, improving something, or are designs of hers. She comes in and listens to the XM with me quite often and we share a dance to the good songs. Life is good, and I married both my best friend and lover in the same person.

oldtiffie
01-01-2011, 11:41 PM
But,, Honey,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, you spend all that time in your,e shop, then when you do finish up and come to bed,, you stay up all hours reading "Homeshop Machinist" magazines, then jump back and forth to your,e pile of other books beside the bed, researching stuff in "Machinery,s Handbook" and mumbling as you scribble notes , jump back up in the night and go to "Mic" some silly thing, or to dig through your,e scrap pile for that piece that would be perfect for that project, and on and on,,,,,,:D

I more or less had that phase quite some time ago and set about getting out of it and staying out of it - for lots of reasons - wife very much included.

Some who have the bug are that badly "bitten" that they are or can be a total PITA as they pepper everyone and every conversation with it - endlessly.

If people are that absorbed in or addicted to it (or anything similar) they are best alone or left alone (or avoided) as "telling them", no matter how "nicely" or "firmly", has no effect at all other than frustrating the hell out of the "teller" - and lots of others.

They can be a total PITA at a meeting or get-together or BBQ etc. and can break it up or spoil it for others very easily.

Giving them unsubtle/broad hints or the "look" is a waste of time as they either miss the "message" or totally ignore it and continue to press on regardless.

I am damned sure and make sure that never happens here.

If it does happen I will walk out of the shop and start destroying it and sending it scrap - the lot - ASAP.

If I have some one I'd do a job or help with a job in my shop we usually discuss it out of ear-shot of others, decide what needs doing or move to my shop or his and re-open and close the conversation there.

There are only two people in that category.

Neither is "family" or "worthy causes" as they have been on my permanent "black list" for a lot of years and are not coming off it - ever - for abuse of privilege in quite a few ways.

There is only one of the two mentioned that I will loan tools to as he knows how to use and look after them and does it and brings them back in at least as good a condition as when he borrowed it. And he brings it back on time and I never have to "chase" either him or the tool/s.

RB211
01-02-2011, 12:15 AM
I've been a loner most of my life, now I am engaged. Everything I own belongs to both of us now.
In fact I am flying back to Florida to sell my shop tools, all of them. IT costs more to ship them to California than they are worth, and I have no place to put them anywhere. Besides, ALL of them were bought with a credit card, so I never really did own any of them. All the proceeds are going back to the credit card.
With all of this said, she does not stop me from enjoying my other hobbies, like electronics, robotics, computers, and flying. She doesn't mind there is an obstacle course on her bedroom floor for my line following robot, soon to be a maze to test out flood fill algorithms. She knows very full well that I "WILL" have my own workshop filled with over 100,000$ worth of machine tools with steam locomotives all over the place and an L1011 cockpit somewhere on the premises, when we have our own house one day.
Yes, it is frustrating when I am in the middle of doing something on the computer and she wants my attention. In those situations, it never ends well unless I get off the computer.

JRouche
01-02-2011, 01:08 AM
Interesting!!! First off, the relationships. Yup, marriage. Um guys, the wife doesn't much like the hobbies. She would rather you spend ALL that extra time to the fam, THIS IS TRUE. Even if she doesnt say so, she would.

So she deals with it, makes you happy, she may not be. Its YOUR thing, not hers.

She HAS her thing also. Ever think to go there. Yeah, might be boring and not interesting. More than likely HER thing is the family, time to wake up boys.

Do you REALLY think what you have going on in the shop is interesting for her? Its a slim road to find a woman that wants to be interested in YOUR shop ****. If she was truly interested she would have her OWN shop projects. Its NOT all about YOU.. Wake up call to ALL the shop folks. JR

lazlo
01-02-2011, 09:15 AM
Yes, it is frustrating when I am in the middle of doing something on the computer and she wants my attention. In those situations, it never ends well unless I get off the computer.

Wait 'till you have kids...

gnm109
01-02-2011, 10:25 AM
I've been a loner most of my life, now I am engaged. Everything I own belongs to both of us now.
In fact I am flying back to Florida to sell my shop tools, all of them. IT costs more to ship them to California than they are worth, and I have no place to put them anywhere. Besides, ALL of them were bought with a credit card, so I never really did own any of them. All the proceeds are going back to the credit card.
With all of this said, she does not stop me from enjoying my other hobbies, like electronics, robotics, computers, and flying. She doesn't mind there is an obstacle course on her bedroom floor for my line following robot, soon to be a maze to test out flood fill algorithms. She knows very full well that I "WILL" have my own workshop filled with over 100,000$ worth of machine tools with steam locomotives all over the place and an L1011 cockpit somewhere on the premises, when we have our own house one day.
Yes, it is frustrating when I am in the middle of doing something on the computer and she wants my attention. In those situations, it never ends well unless I get off the computer.

I sympathize with you since it sounds as if you will be giving up a great deal to enter into this relationship.

As an attorney I wish to offer a slight correction. You say that you are "engaged" and that..."Everything I own belongs to both of us now."

No. That will be the case after the wedding. In fact, she may wind up owning it all. LOL. Don't ask me how I know. :)

For the record, I've been married to the same lady for many years. Our relationship only works because neither of us had to change our basic personalities and interests as a result of the marriage. She has always supported my mechanical pursuits and I never flinch when she wants to do something that pleases her.

Beyond that, one's mate needs to let one be themselves.

vpt
01-02-2011, 10:27 AM
I make money in my shop and all women like money so she doesn't complain to much.