View Full Version : OT my wife is trying to kill me.

Dr Stan
06-30-2013, 07:09 PM
My wife is trying to kill me by giving me a heart attack.

Let me explain.

Friday morning at work I received a phone call from the Owensboro Police Department. It was a dispatcher who asked me if I owned a VW Jetta to which I replied yes. Then there was a very l o n g pause. I finally got the dispatchers attention by insisting that she tell me what was going on. Of course given her recent medical history the worst case scenarios were flying though my mind.

The dispatcher asked me if I was driving the car and I said "no, my wife is". Turns out it was parked going the wrong way on a one way street in front of the JUDICIAL CENTER! (think court house). I gave the dispatcher my wife's phone number so they could get a hold of her and get the car moved, otherwise it was going to be ticketed and towed.

She was meeting with other members of the Daughters of the King at a local coffee shop and had trouble finding a parking spot. She saw an open one (the one in question) and drove the wrong way on a one way street so she could park in it!

Talk about giving me a scare!

In the end all's well that ends well. The cop was nice & helpful and assisted by stopping traffic so the car could be turned around and facing the correct direction and subsequently parked legally. Amazingly enough she did not even get a ticket.

Help! My wife is trying to give me a heart attack!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The Artful Bodger
06-30-2013, 07:10 PM
Young and blonde or old and gray?:rolleyes:

06-30-2013, 07:12 PM
Young and blonde or old and gray?:rolleyes:

Driving a Jetta - you need to ask?

06-30-2013, 08:03 PM

06-30-2013, 08:22 PM
Old joke;

A guy answers a knock at the dooor to find two sherrif's deputies there.

He asks if there is a problem.
One of the deputies asks if he was married and does he have a picture of his wife.
The guy answers yes, and shows a recent photo of his wife.

The deputy says, "I'm sorry sir, but it looks like your wife was hit by a truck."

"I know." says the guy, "But she has a sweet personality and is a great cook."

06-30-2013, 08:36 PM
Don't eat the green jello.:rolleyes:

06-30-2013, 08:41 PM
My grandmother killed all 3 husbands with her cooking,
yep all had massive heart attacks. Arteries clogged solid
with grease. She eats the same way, but for some reason
she is going to live till 100. I don't think science can explain it.


06-30-2013, 08:58 PM
Driving a Jetta - you need to ask?

I bet she has her baseball cap on backwards when driving!