Page 3 of 11 FirstFirst 12345 ... LastLast
Results 21 to 30 of 102

Thread: I heard a new one today

  1. #21
    Join Date
    Oct 2002
    Location
    Cheyenne Wyo
    Posts
    643

    Default

    for lack of power; That thing wouldn't turn over the dynamo in a lightning bug's ass.

  2. #22
    Join Date
    May 2010
    Location
    Boyne City, Mi
    Posts
    25

    Default

    That man's so crooked he has to sleep in a round house.
    If I came down to your level, I'd have to hiss.
    He's so low he could s--- off a snake.
    He didn't carve a career, he chiseled it.

  3. #23
    Join Date
    May 2007
    Location
    Live Oak, TEXAS
    Posts
    1,414

    Default

    "Hotter than a Mexican's lunch."
    "That boy's about as sharp as a sack full of wet mice." - Foghorn Leghorn

  4. #24
    Join Date
    Dec 2011
    Location
    Nottingham, England. UK
    Posts
    30

    Default

    If it's got wheels or tits, it's gonna be trouble.


    Martin.

  5. #25
    Join Date
    May 2010
    Location
    West Michigan
    Posts
    26

    Default

    The two I remember growing up (odd both are temp related):
    'Colder than a welldigger's ass in Montana'
    'Colder than a whitches titty in a brass bra'

    I think the latter was used for colder temps than the former. And that was before Modanna actuallly wore the brass bra thing, back in the '80s.

  6. #26
    Join Date
    Jun 2007
    Posts
    833

    Default

    As useless as an ashtray on a motorcycle

    As useless as a chocolate firescreen

    He would put tits on a bull

  7. #27
    Join Date
    Jul 2007
    Posts
    1,432

    Default

    "Handy as a pocket in a shirt."
    "Cold enough to freeze the nuts off a John Deere plow."
    "Nervous as a long-tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs."
    Duffy, Gatineau, Quebec

  8. #28
    Join Date
    Mar 2004
    Location
    Port Colborne,On.
    Posts
    160

    Default

    His brains are as scarce as the grace of god in a whore house.

  9. #29
    Join Date
    Sep 2011
    Location
    Langley, British Columbia
    Posts
    392

    Default

    I worked on a ranch east of Williams Lake (B.C.) in the mid 60s. Guy I worked for was an American and he had been a road and rail construction superintendent for the McLeod River Logging Co. in northern California before he bought the ranch and moved up north. He was a tough old bird but we got along just fine.

    Three things I remember about him were his Bull Durham Navy Cut tobacco, strong black coffee and this phrase...

    "Tighter than a bull's ass in fly time."
    Keith
    __________________________
    Just one project too many--that's what finally got him...

  10. #30
    Join Date
    Mar 2004
    Location
    Port Colborne,On.
    Posts
    160

    Default

    He's as sharp as a bowling ball.
    He reminds me of a light bulb, bright but no brains.
    I'm as busy as a cat with two asses on a tin roof.
    Lucky as a two peckered billy goat.
    These are a few that I've heard over the years.

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •