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Fart noise for a cell ringtone?? Got a joke?

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  • #16
    Originally posted by David E Cofer
    NOW Wolfie...

    I keep socks in my drawers.
    Does that help?


    • #17
      NO, but ..... Dating a nurse at a local hospital for a bit? there was this guy with a cucumber taped to his leg. THE doctor started laughing so hard he almost had to leave the room.

      He had been in a car accident coming back from a club in Chattanooga.

      Mom always wanted me to have on clean drawers in case I got in his predicament. She knew I'd wake up in the hospital in my undies sooner or later.

      fart ringtone
      BY the way, a fart is a ringtone at this place.
      Last edited by Dawai; 08-09-2007, 07:18 PM.
      Excuse me, I farted.


      • #18
        A Springfield woman wrote a let and sent it to her son in Australia.
        Dear Son:
        Your Pa has a good job now. The first he has had in 48 years. We are a great deal better off now than we was.
        Your Pa gets $14.95 cents every Thursday so we thot we would do a little fixing up.
        We sent to Monky Wards for one of them new fandangle things they call a bath room you have heard about it. In some new homes it is put in shape by a man called a plumer on one side of the room is a big long thing like the pigs drink out of only you get in that thing and wash all over. An on the other side is a little white thing called a sink. This is for light washing such as your hands and face and over in the other corner now son I’ll tell you something We really got something. This little contrapsion you just put in 1 foot in and wash it clean and then you pull a little chain and you have clean water for the other foot. 2 lids came with this darn thing and we haven’t had any use for them in the bath room so I am using one for a bread board and the other one has a round hole in it so we just framed grandpa’s picture, they are awful nice folks to deal with they gave us free a big roll of writing paper also. Take care of yourself son.

        I am still your mom.
        North Central Arkansas


        • #19


          Problems worthy of attack prove their worth by hitting back
          - Piet Hein


          • #20
            The IRS sends an annoying auditor to audit a synagogue.

            The auditor is going through the checks, and turns to the Rabbi and says, "I notice that you buy a lot of candles."

            "Yes," answered the Rabbi.

            "Well, Rabbi, what do you do with the candle drippings?" he asked.

            "A good question," noted the Rabbi. "We actually save them up. When we have enough, we send them back to the candle maker. And every now and then, they send us a free box of candles."

            "Oh," replied the auditor somewhat disappointed that his question actually had a practical answer. So he thought he'd try another question.

            "Rabbi, what about all these matzo purchases? What do you do ... with the crumbs from the matzo?"Ah, yes," replied the Rabbi calmly, "we actually collect up the crumbs, we send them in a box back to the manufacturer and every now and then, they send a box of matzo balls."

            "Oh," replied the auditor, thinking hard how to fluster the Rabbi.

            "Well, Rabbi," he went on, "what do you do with all the foreskins from the circumcisions? ""Yes, here too, we do not waste," answered the Rabbi. "What we do is save up all the foreskins. And when we have enough we actually send them to the Internal Revenue Service."

            "The Internal Revenue Service?," questioned the auditor in disbelief.
            "Ah, yes," replied the Rabbi, "Internal Revenue Service. And... about once a year, they send us a little prick like you."


            • #21
              That one sounds familiar


              • #22
                LOL...this is the kind of discussion you normally see going on over on the "Practical Joke" Machinist site.


                Any jokes concerning divining rods?