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What not to say to your wife!!!

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  • What not to say to your wife!!!

    This morning my wife asks me, "Do you still love me?"

    I reply, "Yes, you are everything I ever wanted in a woman plus more." She smiles and says, "More." Then I couldn't resist. (pause) Yes dear, about twenty pounds more!"

    It might be a long cold winter!
    Location: The Black Forest in Germany

    How to become a millionaire: Start out with 10 million and take up machining as a hobby!

  • #2
    It's funny, but I'm hoping you really didn't say that.
    VitŮŽria, Brazil

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    • #3
      It may be. The sheep may get prettier also.
      Byron Boucher
      Burnet, TX

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      • #4
        I spank girls if they let themselves get a little to heavy --- trouble being is some of them actually like that and this can result in binge eating and turn into a vicious cycle...

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        • #5
          I did really say that this morning.
          Location: The Black Forest in Germany

          How to become a millionaire: Start out with 10 million and take up machining as a hobby!

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          • #6
            I wouldn't worry too much then. She's apparently got a great sense of humor....she married you.

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            • #7
              To Cuddle with a skinny woman is like cuddleing with a plastic manikin. I like women that are a little on the plus size.

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              • #8
                She was the answer to my prayers - but not what I prayed for.

                Been married 42 years.
                Weston Bye - Author, The Mechatronist column, Digital Machinist magazine
                ~Practitioner of the Electromechanical Arts~

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                • #9
                  Women marry men hoping to change them...
                  Men marry women hoping they WON'T change.

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                  • #10
                    When mine asks that question I am expected to hand over the credit card,with a smile and say"You are everything I ever hoped for"

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                    • #11
                      Bruce---Time for a quick shuffle, and "Yes Dear, There's just that much more to love!!!"
                      Brian Rupnow

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                      • #12
                        Originally posted by Black Forest
                        This morning my wife asks me, "Do you still love me?"

                        I reply, "Yes, you are everything I ever wanted in a woman plus more." She smiles and says, "More." Then I couldn't resist. (pause) Yes dear, about twenty pounds more!"

                        It might be a long cold winter!
                        Yes, I do believe you are in trouble.

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                        • #13
                          Originally posted by A.K. Boomer
                          I spank girls if they let themselves get a little to heavy
                          Too... much.... information...
                          "Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did."

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                          • #14
                            Originally posted by Black Forest
                            This morning my wife asks me, "Do you still love me?"

                            I reply, "Yes, you are everything I ever wanted in a woman plus more." She smiles and says, "More." Then I couldn't resist. (pause) Yes dear, about twenty pounds more!"

                            It might be a long cold winter!
                            You could always try that old classic just to check if you are in the dog house.

                            "I suppose a jump is out the question ? "
                            .

                            Sir John , Earl of Bligeport & Sudspumpwater. MBE [ Motor Bike Engineer ] Nottingham England.



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                            • #15
                              I've got nothing against a large woman.

                              They're warmth in the winter ...

                              ...and shade in the summer.
                              .
                              "People will occasionally stumble over the truth, but most of the time they will pick themselves up and carry on" : Winston Churchill

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